Gluten-Free Diet: What The Hell Can I Eat?

Written by Don P on . Posted in Challenge #5

(Reading time: 2 - 3 minutes)

Presumably I scared quite a few people when I listed the foods you can't eat while following a gluten-free diet, especially since beer was on that list. But have no fear, ethanol lovers: You can still imbibe with distilled liquors! When a spirit is distilled, the pure ethanol is extracted from the grain and all the gluten is left behind. So in other words, when someone distills a spirit like rum, whiskey, vodka or gin, it automatically makes it gluten-free. Fuck yeah, science! - Jesse Pinkman Science

So drink all the Jack Daniel's you want. Hell, you're probably halfway through a bottle right now, you Celiac motherfucker. However, doing this while pregnant may still result in a few miscarriages, but hey, gluten-free, right?

Foods to Eat!

Grains and Starches

Tapioca; soybean; potato; arrowroot flours.

Buckwheat; quinoa; amaranth; millet; teff; sourghum (Milo); flax.

Rice; puffed rice; cream-of-rice; wild rice

Corn; unflavored popcorn; cornmeal, hominy; grits; corn starch

Pure, gluten-free oats may be allowed: talk to a health professional.

Ready-to-eat cereal made from allowed grains; gluten-free pasta and bread products.


Fresh brewed coffee (no grains added); teas without prohibited grains.

Milk, chocolate milk prepared with cocoa.

100% fruit juices, soda (check labels).

Wine; distilled alcohols and cordials (check labels for preservatives and dyes); gluten-free beer.

Soups and Casseroles

Clear, home-made broth; gluten-free bouillon cubes; soups made with rice or gluten-free pasta and gluten-free stock; creamed soups and chowders thickened with cream, cornstarch, potato flour or other allowed special flours.

Homemade or prepared gluten-free macaroni without sauces thickened with flour; gratins made with only cream (no flour or prohibited thickeners).


Butter; oils (check label for wheat germ oil or any unidentified oil source); lard; most vegetable shortenings and margarines (check labels); foods fried in uncontaminated oils that have not been breaded with prohibited flours.

Pure mayonnaise (and other salad dressings that are thickened with egg, cornstarch or allowed special flours); homemade salad dressings made with distilled vinegar.

Cream; bacon; nuts; olives; peanut butter; avocado; sour cream and cream cheese (check labels).

Seasonings, Dressings, and Sweets

Pure spices and herbs; salt; monosodium glutamate (MSG).

Sugar; molasses; honey; jelly; jam; corn syrup; maple syrup; imitation or pure vanilla extract.

Pure cocoa; pure chocolate; coconut; marshmallows and candies made from allowed grains.

Ketchup; mustard; pickles; relish; horseradish; steak sauce not prepared with prohibited ingredients; gluten-free soy sauce.

Distilled rice, wine, or cider vinegar.

Dairy Products

Whole, low-fat, skim, fresh, dried or evaporated milk; flavored milks (check labels).

Plain yogurt and kefir; flavored yogurt and kefir (check labels).

All aged hard cheeses (cheddar, parmesan, Swiss, etc.); cottage cheese (check labels).

Fruits and Vegetables

Fresh, frozen, dried or canned (check labels).

Meats and Substitutes

Fresh meat; poultry; fish and shellfish; eggs.

Edamame (soy beans); tofu; beans; nuts (check labels).


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