Remember that M. Night Shyamalan movie where plants banned together to say, "Fuck you," to all of humanity by releasing a toxin that caused people to repeatedly stab themselves, hurl themselves off roofs, blow their own brains out, stand catatonically in front of an oncoming lawn mower, listen to Justin Bieber, and just pull out all the tricks from a big giant bag of fun suicides?
We laughed hysterically, not only because we never thought Shyamalan could produce anything worse than "Lady in the Water," but because, come on, plants? Really? Even Mark Wahlberg (who was in the movie) admits he thought the entire movie was absolute shit.
But what if M. Night was right? ...
- A wheat allergy is an allergy — not a disease.
- Some people with a wheat allergy can grow out of their allergy; people with celiac disease have the condition for life.
- Everything that has ever tasted amazing and delicious contains wheat.
As implied by the name, a wheat allergy is an allergic reaction to wheat. The person suffers from near-immediate or slightly delayed (within a few hours) symptoms after ingesting a food product that includes wheat. Mild symptoms usually start as respiratory in nature (stuffy nose, wheezing, watery eyes) but in the most serious cases can fuck your world up by adding difficulty breathing and shock. If you thought that a gluten intolerance or celiac disease was bad enough, researchers have actually identified 27 different potential wheat allergens — gluten is ONLY ONE potential allergen, but more than two dozen others exist.
The goods news is, like celiac, less than 1% of people have a wheat allergy.
The Mild Symptoms
- Watery Eyes
- Pale Skin
- Chronic “Hay Fever”
- Hives or Swelling of Skin
- Diarrhea, Cramps, Nausea, or Vomiting
- Sinus Congestion or Pressure
The More Serious Symptoms
- Chest Tightness
- Difficulty Breathing
- Unusually Fast Heart Rate
The "HOLY FUCKING SHIT" Symptoms
- Severe Difficulty Breathing
- Dangerously Low Blood Pressure
- Loss of Complete Consciousness