Thanksgiving has come and gone, leaving behind an added five pounds to serve as a reminder that when someone asks, "Hey, you want a third piece of pie?" the answer should be, "Umm... Make it a small slice. I wouldn't want to over do it! Hahahaha!" After dinner you kindly excused yourself to saunter off to the bathroom to floss more food from between your teeth than a citizen of a third-world country eats in a year. But that's America, baby.
Because my wife's holiday travel schedule this year had her traveling to her parents' house a day earlier than I did, I had a lot of time alone in the car to think and reflect about this previous year. With the absence of "Slow down!", "I have to go to the bathroom!", and "You missed the turn", I was able to really think about which memorable events from the past year have made a big difference in my life.
#4: GTA V
Rockstar Games is known for the incredibly obsessive attention to detail they add to their over-the-top, ultra-violent video games to make them so realistic that you'll go to bed completely satisfied, truly believing that you kicked a mountain lion the the face just for shits and giggles. The amount of destruction, chaos, and anarchy you can virtually create in this game is unparalleled to anything non-Jihadist. How many times in your life will you be able to participate in a devil's three-way with a hooker and random guy on the street, shoot both in the face when done, and walk away richer than when you started? Three, tops? Or how about laying out a mime like this?:
The birth of the "Knockout Game"
#3: Obamacare (More accurately, Healthcare.gov)
Before you start thinking, "Great this is going to turn into a political debate," it isn't. Members of any political party can, and should, agree that the website Healthcare.gov has been an absolute disaster since the site's official launch of October 1st. You see, I own and operate a website design company to earn extra money throughout the year. A client's objection of, "You're charging me a thousand dollars for a website!? That's outrageous, I won't pay!" can now easily be overcome by saying, "A thousand dollars for a website that works might seem a little steep, until you take into consideration a $600 million website that doesn't work." The check pretty much writes itself at that point.
#2: The Fact That I'm Not This Guy (Self-explanatory)
I don't feel the need to elaborate.
#1: For My Friends, Family, and Blog Readers (No, seriously)
All jokes aside, I have been extremely fortunate to have people in my life that provide support, motivation, and an unconditional loyalty despite some of the more crazy antics I've pulled. Walt Whitman said, "I no doubt deserved my enemies, but I don't believe I deserved my friends." After learning this quote, I realized Whitman and I had more in common than the fact that we both wrote a book under the influence of alcohol. You have no idea how much I sincerely appreciate you as an audience — whether I have one reader or 100,000 — coming to this site, reading this gibberish on a daily basis, and in some cases commenting or personally messaging me about a post. Thank you.